Edward Lai Harner, Edward Harner
Andrea Harner
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March 19, 2003

LIFE AFTER LIBERATION, Part II-What their pets will be enjoying

Reporting LIVE from New York City: An ANDREAHARNER.COM EXCLUSIVE on Iraqi life after liberation.

AS THE BOMBS BEGIN FALLING, DRASTICALLY IMPROVED IRAQI PET LIFE is more and more TANGIBLE!!!

Dirt, dust and flying debris will be things of PRE-LIBERATION as Iraqi Poochers wear stylish DOGGY GOGGLES!! Yay!!

doggygoggles.jpg

Iraqi Kitties will finally FEEL SAFE in their very own TIMMY the MOUSE HOUSE!!!

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Iraqi doggies will never have to be left at home again! as was commonplace, in the DARK DAYS BEFORE LIBERATION!!

petwheelaway.jpg

Iraqi Kitties teeter on the edge of being SPOILED ROTTEN! with this new OPPORTUNITY!! Finally, Dirty Iraqi Kitties walk in nature without having to drag in the dirtiness of the outdoors!! Yay!

KittyWalks.jpg

Little Iraqi Doggies, will no longer be depressed nor yearn for a little "FOOT UP!" in the cars because...we offer the PET LOOKOUT SEAT!!

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Finally,"GOING for the GUSTO!" as we friendly folk do! we offer them the option to SEND YOUR IRAQI DOG AWAY to a better, happier place...

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A beautiful Dog Island complete with Dog Statistics! so you always know, what company your NEWLY LIBERATED IRAQI PUPPY IS KEEPING!!

DogIslandDogStatistics.jpg

OPTIONS, OPTIONS, OPTIONS!!
That's what we Americans love and Iraqis soon will as well!!

Americans, Iraqis, American pets, Iraqi pets....
EVERYBODY WINS! in Iraqi Life After Liberation!
HALLELUJAH!!

*******end of report*******

~Stay tuned for Part III of the LIFE AFTER LIBERATION series...~



Comments

i don't know about this dog island thing. don't chinese people eat dogs? but seriously harner, could you ever "free" the sparkster like that? and i KNOW poppy likes to sit on her ass. The lack of pictures and the image of the vegetation restorers makes me nervous about this whole thing. haven't they read jurassic park? haven't any dogs been killed fighting (I read white fang, how bout you?).
this ain't no stuffed animal world. real dogs have teeth.
can we sue them? the whole idea makes me very anxious. what if it suddenly becomes illegal to own dogs and they ALL have to go to dog island? plus, what if the dogs completely destroy the ecosphere of the island. if the project goes belly up are all the dogs returned--or is it gonna be lord of the flies doggy style.
if you feel as distressed as i, join me in my righteous "honk if you think dog island is creepy" campaign.
it's just too weird---yhey can't have thought this through in it's entirety.

Posted by: sketchy dog island at March 20, 2003 3:47 PM

OK, am I incredibly gullible? well, yes, but have I been had? This place is a total joke right? It can't be legal, plus I searched online and found zip, nada, zilch. Located off the Florida coast--yes there is a Dog Island but it sure as shit ain't the dog island that wacked out hitleresque website is talking about (immunization compound my ass). sorry to get so worked up, but I take my dog news seriously and if there's some eyebeam/jonah tomfoolery behind this whole thing I'm going to be miffed. sincerely, a concerned dog love who doubts the veracity of this most recent post by the by and largely trustworthy ms. lily harner.

Posted by: sketchy dog island 2 at March 20, 2003 4:01 PM

by the way, if this is some dastardly scheme to give me an early heart attack--i think the added touch of mispelled words and misused syntax on the site lend credibility to the english as a second language founders thing. And if this is for real--let me once again say "yikes."

Posted by: sketchy dog island 3 at March 20, 2003 4:04 PM

Whoever is behind this foul mess (heh he) shoudl step forward. Who is this mexicokitty? Who is this Jenny Bliss. Andrea, you are aiding and abetting evil here. What strange agenda are these people masking behind their fiendish dog island with its Mandatory Dog Exportation Bill, Director of Imports, vegetation restoration engineers, and links to bare shouldered novels called property? I've been over this site with a fine toothed procrastinator's comb and I am supicious, make that very suspicious. And I can't promise there won't be a "dog island 5" post. I'm on a rampage.

Posted by: sketchy dog island 4 at March 20, 2003 4:20 PM

THERE IS NO MAMADIN CALIFORNIA. THERE IS NO WINAPAKEE NEW JERSEY. I AM NOT A PARANOID PERSON BY NATURE, BUT THIS IS TOO MUCH.
PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY.

Posted by: sketchy dog island 5 at March 20, 2003 4:24 PM

I did a little more research and found this---go to this website to read more about the Dawn Fine Bred MEAT Dog Centre. Owner Han Fei is also a founding member of Dog Island. He says this
"I eat it every day," said Han Fei, Peixian's biggest dog breeder and most likely China's, too. He describes himself as the "dragon head" of the industry, raising 100,000 dogs a year, almost all for slaughter at about six months of age.

OK Andrea, this website had better be a joke or those poor Iraqi pups might as well throw themselves under the nearest MOAB.

Posted by: ATTENTION: SCANDAL UNMASKED at March 20, 2003 6:59 PM

You people are totally wrong!!

This is a shame. That such racism can still exist so openly in this country.

I think you are all very confused about this. I have visited the island and it is beautiful. They are very committed to letting their dogs be truly happy.

You have confused a terrible organization with a wonderful one. Please don't do it again.

The iraqi dogs are very lucky to be considered for part of this.

Posted by: You_are_SO_wrong at March 21, 2003 10:56 AM

Ok Mexico kitty--come out with your PAWS up. This defender of dogs ain't buying your cover up.
Great Logo though :).

Posted by: mexicokitty: the next Cruella deVille? at March 21, 2003 11:05 AM

I rescued/liberated a pup from Iraq during the war. I got the little fellow back to the U.S. and he is living the american dream. If you want a before and after pic. write me. Take care.

Posted by: Sean at May 30, 2003 12:38 AM
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