AndreaHarner.com has announced this Halloween's two most coveted prizes: The Raddest Pet Costume & The Raddest Human Costume!!
The Raddest Pet Costume winner was easy to pinpoint as he rapped ~Lodi Dodi, we likes to party, we don't cause trouble, we don't bother nobody~
The prize obviously went to...
The Raddest Human Costume Award was more difficult....not because it wasn't immediately obvious, I mean, it was...it's just that...the contestant temporarily swept me off of my feet, rendering my judgement completely subjective...however, it all worked out in the end and the winner definitely was...
P, The Mexican Wrestler!!
Look at how grandiose and impressive his entrance into the room was...imagine being there, in person!! I was all shook up and a little frightened.
Then he looked into my eyes like this...my knees went weak and I knew I was hooked on P, The Mexican Wrestler...
He then took my hand, we danced the tango, rose in mouth and all, while he told me tales of his superhuman strength, faraway lands where his magic cape had taken him, his incredible modesty and humility, his struggles with peer envy as a result of his unfair good looks, his to die for cheek bones...
I didn't think P could tongue tie me anymore until I saw up close and personal, his sheer white stockings.
When I was finally mustered up the courage to speak, I said to P,
"One leg has straight, matted leg hairs and the other leg has messy, all bent out of shape leg hairs."
Astonished, he exclaimed, "You noticed my signature detail! Lady, we're meant to be together!
Then P, The Mexican Wrestler ripped off his mask...
and there he was in all his scary handsomeness!
But wait! What is that I see?
A paper clip holds your magic cape together??!! I don't think so, Mr. P!!
And just like that, the magic died for me but my objectivity was restored and I knew that P, The Mexican Wrestler still deserved The Raddest Human Costume Award.
As soon as I handed him the trophy, the magic must have also dissipated for him because he hopped on his magic towel and flew off...
*p.s.-I'm trying to bring bring back the use of the word Rad.