Andrea Harner
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April 29, 2004

Prince's Hoop Dreams

Prince gave an awesome performance last night as aired on MTV, VH1 & BET.

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My favorite moments for those that care were 1) his acoustic versions of I Could Never Take the Place of Your Man and Sweet Thing (no mention of songs from his new album is intentional) and 2) MTV News Correspondent Sway's closing statement to his sweetly nervous interview with Prince, when he shook Prince's hand and said with 110% sincerity, "this is the highlight of my career."

Guess who, in the bottom right hand corner???

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That's right! Prince and his junior high basketball team. They later became the Revolution and then the New Power Generation. J/K.

*thanks to my old friend Stuart for the picture and for planting the seeds of Prince love.

April 28, 2004

Fun w/ cherry blossoms, digital video, photo & animated gifs

Too much fun was had yesterday morning at the Brooklyn Botanic Gardens.

For a little project I'm working on, I wanted to film the cherry blossom trees from underneath the branches with the lens pointed straight up into the blossoms. I also wanted it to be filmed very slowwwly and smoooothly....it was very very hard and although my muscles are super sore today, I can also now do 50 pull ups (the hard kind with knuckles pointed away from me) in rapid succession.

Here's my serious filmmaking in action - Notice, no smiles, no jokes!!

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A big shout out is in order to Jonah, the best Assistant Director a girl could ask for...full of moral support and a great eye for location scouting and documenting...all photos taken by Jonah!

Here's a laugh riot in the form of an animated gif...Jonah's photos strung together into this masterpiece and looped for maximal enjoyment:

Afilming.gif

And here's evidence that I have mastered the highly technical, extremely difficile cross step (difficile means difficult in French, Mr. President):

Acrossstepping.gif

April 26, 2004

Greta does the super cute thing in a planter...

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Poor Pigeon...

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April 23, 2004

Editorializing in Chinatown

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Employees must kill whitey before returning to wok.

*taken by Jonah in the men's bathroom at Joe's Shanghai on Pell St.

Just one please...

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*Houston btw Mott & Mulberry

April 22, 2004

Prince-tastic!

Prince is great. I've adored him since ~ 14 years old and fondly recall being a 16 year old, sneaking out to see a Prince concert in Tokyo in the truest nosebleed seats from where he looked so much tinier than he is in person...even in heels.

A non-fan reviews Prince's current tour

April 20, 2004

Stoopid for President! Part Deux

As part of this morning's Brian Lehrer Show, Brian and callers discussed Bob Woodward's new book "Plan of Attack" and Woodward's interview with Mike Wallace.

In this interview, Woodward shared his recent conversation with the President:

Woodward suggested that people were concerned about the failure to find Weapons of Mass Destruction.

The President's reply: "Well, you travel in elite circles."

Hhhmmm.

Well I guess everyone is a dumb shit. I'm just relieved our fearless leader doesn't have his head up his ass.

Quel relief!

Stoopid for President!

So Kerry speaks fluent French and used to give interviews in French. That is, until Republicans, true to themselves, insinuated that Kerry was too Continental. So what does Kerry do, to salvage any hope that the fine Americans out there who may actually be influenced by Republicans, might come around to voting for him? He stops speaking French.

A perplexed Alain de Chalvron, Washington bureau chief for France 2, the French equivalent of the BBC mused, "For us, to speak any other language and have an open view of the world, for a President, should be a plus."

Well you know what Monsieur Fancy Pants?? Not for us Americans! We need them dumb as...our current President! Yeah! The levels of intellect and thoughtfulness are just about right!!

Thanks anyway for your thoughts and please don't hesitate to drop off more suggestions in the shredder on your way out! Ouch!

The New Yorker, April 19 & 26, 2004, Talk of the Town, Pardon?

Republicans, thank you for the precedent you have set. I am deeply satisfied with the image represented by and actions taken by our current President. Thank you.

April 19, 2004

Manhattan has a welcome visitor today!

...and that visitor is...

God!

Evidence:

NY1weather.jpg

Move over Susan Powter, Choire Sicha's going to stop the Insanity!

I like Choire Sicha's writing.

He writes for the New York Observer, Gawker & his personal site.

He also wrote this NYTimes Book Review of Bergdorf Blondes by Plum Sykes that made me chuckle amidst the madness of the sad and sorry reality of the book's characters.

My vow to my beloved city: Rest assured, I will single handedly, well, with the help of Choire, and the rest of the normal people in NYC, root out the Bergdorf Blondes and restore you to your good graces. And that's a promise...well, at the very least, my really really good intentions.

April 16, 2004

It's a Countdown...don't sleep.

On your mark...

Get set...

Go!

and be a nasty nasty guy who would countdown to the moment Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen turn "playboy legal".

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Eeeew.

And yes, this is a picture of the Olsens looking forward to turning 18 and ripe for you!

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Thankfully with the help of google, one has the ability to excercise choice, among the numerous Olsen twins countdown sites...

Oh!

don't miss out on the latest breaking news about the twins via this tool

or...

this more focused search

or...

you get the point.

Hug a friend today...if you wanna live.

Confucious say...Close Relationship Helps Heart.

April 15, 2004

Evil Twin

Since back in the day when Andrea Spratt and I were mature and stylish 14 year olds, ubiquitously known as Andrea Squared, I've known that I was the kind, timid and perfect Andrea and that Andrea Spratt was the evil twin.

It became clear like crystal during my recent trip to LA.

Here she coerced the monkey into holding her hand and when monkey looked away for a second...

MonkeyandAndreafinger.jpg

$1 bill? What? Where?

And she tries to play it off like, "I just love a firm grip on a monkey finger!"

Notice the monkey twisting its shoulder trying to get away while Andrea's bony fingers crushed the monkey finger. It was amputated soon after and she threw it to the brown dog in the background...R.I.P.

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Quickly rebounding from that mess, Andrea couldn't turn down an opportunity to degrade a hungry person turned prostitute.

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And still, Andrea could only think of one thing...modeling.

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But alas, even this evil twin needs to drink to smooth over life's rough edges.

Let's just say, when her head hits the pillow each and every night, things are reeeaaal smooth.

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I am delighted to announce that this fabulous evil twin without whom I could never be the sweet and shy Andrea that I am...has started her own blog!!!

Check it out but watch out! She'll cut you!

April 12, 2004

The Exorcist revisited.

Check out this funny video: The Exorcist in 30 seconds, re-enacted by bunnies.

My favorite: The little bunny's mother telling her, "it's just nerves." Cut to shot of the bunny being flailed around in her bed squeeling, "mo~~~ther~~~~~~"

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*thanks Kenyatta!

April 9, 2004

Oh Sofia...

If this is true, I must say my peace: Sofia should get her fair allowance for the chores she does around the house...nothing more, nothing less.

SofiaAllowance.jpg

On a more compassionate note, it really must be hard for her to be under the tyrannical thumb of Francis...

*via Gawker.com

April 7, 2004

My LA Friends

LA really is a super friendly city...especially when you hang out with furry friends and fondle them non-stop...and here they are:

1) Sparky!! as you all know already...15 years old but feeling younger and sassier every day...Sparky for President!

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2) My brother's girlfriend's (sister's, brother's, daughter's...) baby Beagle, Chloe:

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Perhaps you can guess why her nickname is Left-Eye Chloe?! (as in Left-Eye Lopez, of course...RIP):

Chloe1.jpg

3) and Moby, Andrea Spratt's cat who guarded my new spring heels from those crazy LA girls...wow, looking at those hot shoes makes me feel better about that loan I took out to pay for them...

Mobyandmyshoes.jpg

As for the people in LA, they are animals, I tell you...simply animals...

April 6, 2004

My Precious

While in LA, I gave birth to a precious baby!

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On the left is Andrea (aka Flatback), my best friend and on the right is Ed (aka Fast Eddie), my bro and the baby's spiritual advisor.

Look how they spoil the baby by feeding it a fireball...

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April 1, 2004

I love Jet Blue

I'm sitting at Gate 7 of the JFK Jet Blue terminal and I've realized that if I could marry Jet Blue, I would. Jet Blue offers free WiFi, a sizeable sushi bar and constant Animal Planet programming in the air.

Here's a Hasidic man reconciling his lust for WiFi with his religious devotion:

HasidicManandWifiHotSpot.jpg

Here's the Deep Blue Sushi chef whipping up some magic for those savvy enough to choose Jet Blue:

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No, I'm not paid by Jet Blue although I should be...as every good marriage, it would be a beautiful partnership!

Off to Snoop Dogg Airport, aka Long Beach Airport!!

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