Andrea Harner
andreaharnerblog AT gmail
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November 30, 2004

A Night of Kyoto Theater

While in Japan this summer Jonah and I took a night bus tour of Kyoto which lasted only a few hours and in typically overpriced Japanese fashion cost 8,000 yen ($80) per person. The final stop on the tour was the theater which was run by the "strict spotlight method". This consists of all centimeters of the stage populated by actors and props for the entire duration while the strong spotlight strictly guides the audience's eyes to one particular activity at a time as the rest of the stage is blanketed in darkness. What then happens to some of us is that we want to stare at everything that's in the dark and not spotlighted because it's the same part of the brain that wants to laugh maniacally in a library. Accompanying this method was an overly enunciated Japanese-American voice narrating too dramatically. Here we see the aaaaancient aaaart of flower arraaaaangement, Ikebaaaaaana. Oh but it was worth it.

Especially for the dance theater:


And the puppet theater:


We were riveted:


Oniichann: Kore wa jyoudann desu! Jitsuwa totemo tanoshikatta desu. Arigatou!

November 29, 2004

Modern Pooch has launched!

Dear Online Family,

It is with great pleasure and a heart thumping with pride, that Sparky and I announce the launch of, where the dog obsessed can get their daily doggy fix of cute pics, funny stories and useful tips.

So everyday when you feel that familiar ache for the now know where to look -!



Sparky & Andrea Harner

P.S. This site will keep on truckin' with everything but dogs.

November 24, 2004

What Dog Are You?

Take the highly scientific CATS quiz (Canine Algorithmic Transfer System) to determine what breed of dog you'd be if you were lucky enough to be a dog.

Click into this flash site and then click on "games" which appears on the upper left corner and test take away!

I'm a Piccolo Levriero Italiano (Italian Greyhound) and Jonah's a Sloughi (Slughi) so what are you?

Of course the descriptions are all postive so everyone can enjoy this fantastical game:


November 22, 2004

ULTRA Hanami...coming soon!


Imagine enjoying sushi, sake and Japanese music while sitting under a cherry blossom canopy with falling digitally cultivated petals...

Having grown up in Japan I often miss and long for my hanami (cherry blossom viewing) memories so I've created an EYEBEAM Artists in Residence Benefit that features the cherry blossom footage I shot in the spring at the Brooklyn Botanic Gardens with some computer graphics magic created in EYEBEAM's Moving Image Studios!

If you're in the New York area, please join us for what I promise will be a super fun and memorable evening!

Seating is limited to 100 so please purchase tickets soon.

And don't forget your party pants, party shoes and party 'tude!

November 21, 2004

Bedroom Etiquette

If you put up a heart-shaped mirror in the bedroom you share with your fiancee/boyfriend/Jonah, like so:


Be prepared for this sort of a response:


I'm proud to say, I've stood my ground though!

I've kept the mirror up on the wall!

...brown paper bag and all.

November 19, 2004

Bush & Condi Rice in Love Part II

I can't wait for the third pic of this series...eeew!


President Bush has given female nominees such as Condoleezza Rice, above, and Margaret Spellings congratulatory kisses, but has given male nominees such as Alberto Gonzales a handshake and a pat on the back.

November 18, 2004

"I want my Mama"

You've got to watch this:


* Thanks to Mena!

November 17, 2004

Bush and Condi Rice in Love

It's official and on the front page of the New York Times today...Bush & Condi are in love.

Supposedly they're all lovey eyes while the rest of the administration rolls their eyes.


Condoleezza Rice with President Bush at the White House on Tuesday when he announced that she was his choice to succeed Colin L. Powell as secretary of state. Questions abound as to her policy orientation.

Girlfriend's Lap Pillow & Boyfriend's Arm Pillow

There's no better joke to play on your significant other than to be cuddled up on someone's lap or in someone's arms when they get home...

With the help of these Japanese necessities and a little imagination on how to complete the picture, you've got your friendly gag!



For further reading on Unuseless Japanese inventions, here's an important book.

* Thanks to Annie Liptak for the links!

November 16, 2004

Ramen, Eating & Japan

Food and eating may be the two things most resembling religion in Japan. It's not surprising then that having grown up in Japan, I am a devout food fanatic with Japanese cuisine coming in 1st and Chinese cuisine following closely behind. My Chinese mother is ok with this order of preference because she knows it's close enough not to relegate me to the disrespectful daughter category.

Here's a mouth-watering NYTimes article on ramen in NYC:


And here's a little less mouth-watering look at eating taken a bit seriously...hee hee hee (my hand covers my mouth as I understate and giggle):


November 15, 2004

Lucy the Dog, RIP.

Today is a sad day because Lucy the Dog passed away over the weekend. She was a super sweet dog who had a rough life until she was rescued by Janice and from that moment on she was deeply loved as every doggy should be. Although Janice only had a short three years with Lucy they shared a bond that was plain for all the world to see.


November 12, 2004

Post-Election Thong

All this post-election nuttiness has someone a little scatterbrained!


To retrieve...


51% Bush + 48% Kerry =


* via EYEBEAM's ReBlog

November 11, 2004

The Onion: Nation's Poor Win Election for Nation's Rich

Click for more:


Culture of Life?

Remember when Bush said during the debates that he promotes a "culture of life"?

Well I'm confused because these are faces of the American soldiers who have died in Iraq over the last year (growing daily, of course)...not to mention the number of civilian deaths in Iraq, the increasingly unaffordable health care costs and rising mortality rate in this country.

I guess I'm just an abortion party hosting, bleeding heart liberal that just doesn't get it.

November 10, 2004

A Day in the Life of Joe Republican

I am unstoppable in this post-election atmosphere!!!

Post, post, post, breathe, breathe, beathe, post, post post, breeeeeaaathe.

Some of you are loving me and others...not so much.

Self-reliance? Remember folks, people need each other.

Hold me. I'm feeling close to (some of) you.



Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with
water to prepare his
morning coffee. The water is clean and good because
some tree-hugging
liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.

With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily
medication. His
medications are safe to take because some stupid
commie liberal fought to
ensure their safety and that they work as advertised.

All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his
employer's medical plan
because some liberal union workers fought their
employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too.

He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs.
Joe's bacon is safe to
eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to
regulate the meat
packing industry.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo.
His bottle is properly
labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the
total contents because
some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what
he was putting on his
body and how much it contained.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath.
The air he breathes is
clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal
fought for the laws to
stop industries from polluting our air.

He walks to the subway station for his
government-subsidized ride to work.
It saves him considerable money in parking and
transportation fees because
some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public
transportation, which
gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with
excellent pay, medical
benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation
because some lazy liberal
union members fought and died for these working
standards. Joe's employer
pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't
want his employees to
call the union.

If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll
get a worker
compensation or unemployment check because some stupid
liberal didn't think
he should lose his home because of his temporary

It's noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so
he can pay some bills.
Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC
because some godless
liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from
unscrupulous bankers who ruined
the banking system before the Great Depression.

Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage
and his below-market
federal student loan because some elitist liberal
decided that Joe and the
government would be better off if he was educated and
earned more money over
his lifetime.

Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father
this evening at his
farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the
drive. His car is among
the safest in the world because some America-hating
liberal fought for car
safety standards.

He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third
generation to live in the
house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because
bankers didn't want
to make rural loans. The house didn't have electricity
until some
big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't
belong and demanded
rural electrification.

He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His
father lives on
Social Security and a union pension because some
cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of
himself so Joe
wouldn't have to.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns
on a radio talk show.
The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and
conservatives are
good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans
have fought against
every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his

Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government
liberals ruining our lives!
After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone
should take care of
themselves, just like I have."

* written by Donna L. Lavins and Sheldon Cotler.

Free vs Slave States & Fuck the South

Wow, blog readers...we've really got a debate a ragin' on the United States of Canada and Jesusland post!

Here's more fuel for the fire:


Compare through the tears!


Here's a rant that's deservedly making the blogosphere rounds but probably won't help the cause unless the cause is secession.

Click for more:


If anyone knows the author of "Fuck the South" please give a holler...planning a dinner party.

November 8, 2004

D the Russian Blue Cat

Poised with my camera and my patient, winning attitude, I waited for nearly 5 hours to capture this tongue shot and let me tell you folks, in this situation as in life, you can get what you want as long as you're willing to sacrifice a balanced and productive life.


*Thanks to Peter's awesome cat D who looks like a

Straight male seeks Bush supporter

This is a craig's list posting that has been taken down because all good things must come to an end:


November 7, 2004

Finnegan the Fly French Bulldog

If Finnegan were a chick, she'd be a chick other girls hated for being unbearably cute and photogenic.


* 4 month old Finn posed patiently near Columbus Circle on Nov. 7, NYC Marathon Day.

November 4, 2004

United States of Canada and Jesusland

No nonsense border patrol please:


* Thanks for the gem, Lars!

Optimistic Critical Thought Begets Stronger DEM Party

I am back and psyched!

A day of mourning, 8 hours of sleep and cups of espresso have something to do with it.

Mostly, I am profoundly excited by the fact that people are talking about what went wrong, how could we have done better, how do we change to win in '08??

And this is exactly what we should be concentrating on now.

We are a smart party, people.

Let's start now to regroup, rethink and restrategize the Dem Party.

Some good thoughts to get you revved up:

Simple but Effective: Why you keep losing to this idiot.

Democratic Values: How to start winning the red states.

And yes, all future post titles will follow the ______ Begets ________ format.

Photos to make Republicans quiver at my new strength and determination:



November 3, 2004

Defeat Begets Strength to Persevere

I'm stunned and feel unprepared to write or say anything about Kerry's defeat. I truly believed we'd be celebrating and joking about being unable to stop smiling. What a surprising, complex and maddening blessing, democracy is.

After canvasing for days in the hot Florida sun and having been bombarded on election day with astonishingly positive exit poll numbers, defeat feels like getting the wind knocked out of you while agonizing over a break-up. This was a brutal wake-up call but consider us awoken and kicking.

We cried more than once today but we know that we must persevere, fight and hope, harder and stronger than ever.


* Andrea, Jonah, Susan and John at ACT headquarters in Fort Lauderdale, FLA.

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