Again, thanks to Gmail for combing through my emails and displaying links they think will be of interest to me, we have a whole page of funny quotes by Rita Rudner.
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.
Never play peekaboo with a child on a long plane trip. There's no end to the game. Finally I grabbed him by the bib and said, "Look, it's always gonna be me!"