Edward Lai Harner, Edward Harner
Andrea Harner
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July 28, 2006

MIAMI July '06!!

For my 30th birthday Jonah and I went to Miami!

South Beach baby!

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Look at that delicious ocean!

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See how clear the water is?

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I realized early on that I am a water creature. Like a fish out of water that's just been returned to the ocean/the fishbowl/the river, I was so fucking happy and relieved to be in water:

MiamiBeachAndreahappywatercreature.jpg

But my eyeballs are more of the delicate human kind:

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Get away from me while I'm peeing! J/K. I've never ever peed in the ocean.

MiamiBeachAndreainwater.jpg

Jonah's more like an amphibian but he was loving it too:

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This is an advertisement for marriage & visors:

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Note that the further out people went, the shallower it got - it was surreal:

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If you're looking for a good pose you can always fall back on, try this Japanese inspired classic!

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The type of beach I love - with beach chairs and umbrellas. The Hotel was great in that included in your price of stay are complimentary beach chairs and umbrellas:

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A bunch of beach bums:

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A perfectly nice butt:

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Hey, Baywatch!

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Pam?? Carmen?? Hoff, you there??

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You have to love Miami dolls girls - bleached blonde, all smiles, hot pink lipstick, sunglasses, nails and bikini:

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After a day at the beach we checked out Miami architecture - don't knock the deco!

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Many of the buildings in Miami also change colors:

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They think it's worth the money:

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Obviously it is:

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The first night we went to a Cuban diner/restaurant and ate terrible bread and salad and terrific shrimp in garlic sauce:

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You can all thank my camera for its self-timer function - without it you wouldn't have this special picture (Todd Oldham tie-dye robes are yours to roll around in while staying at the Todd Oldham designed The Hotel):

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On the second day it started storming at about 2 pm.

I just didn't want to buy it.

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The clouds don't say t-storm do they?

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It's like when your bangs are all blowing one way:

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Thank god for Jonah who's blessed with the ability to anticipate so he said, we should leave the beach soon and head to a cafe before all these people do the same. Sad to say, had he not suggested that I would have been the last person on the beach, blindly believing that maybe, just maybe the storm wasn't approaching after all.

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Even though this was what the beach side of the sky looked like...

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The storm was just minutes away and as foreseen, the exodus from the beach to the cafes started right after we nestled in at the News Cafe where we ate and drank a girly drink and a unisex drink:

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My solo wet t-shirt contest - winner!

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Post-storm sky:

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Post-storm ocean:

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Post-storm beach:

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Post-storm lonely lifeguard station:

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Post-storm swim face-lick:

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Off to our fancy dinner at Big Fish:

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Thankfully our cab driver knew exactly where it was because it seems a bit hard to find. In case you're lost with a cabby you can pound on the back of his seat and scream, there's a three foot wide neon sign of the outline of a fish! Can't you find it?? I know we're in a city of neon but it's of a fish!! and you'll find it in no time:

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Fresh made tagliatelle with lobster, shitake mushrooms and truffle butter - quite good although a little too salty:

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Jonah's was delicious - Black ink linguini with scallops & asparagus and saffron sauce:

MiamiBigFishJonahdish.jpg

View from table:

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Across the street from the restaurant was another changing color building:

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It's a night club - the sort of place I don't ever ever ever go to anymore:

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And then there was the rooftop pool which was truly spectacular. Clean, nicely designed, view of the ocean, nice staff, delicious frozen mojitis:

MiamiHotelRooftoppool1.jpg

From the other side:

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I really should have had a visor on! 30 years old and wrinkles accumulating!

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More floating - I only recently accomplished floating so...

MiamiHotelPoolAndreafloating.jpg

Jonah was reading a book that was getting on his nerves - psssttt - Confessions of an Economic Hit Man, it's subject is enticing but it's poorly written by a guy who may have narcissistic personality disorder:

MiamiHotelPoolJonahreads.jpg

Pool time is happy time!

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The pain in the ass nasal spray needed chilling so we gave it some ice and a mint leaf from our mojito - a spray-ito!

MiamiNasalSprayMojito.jpg

On our last night we went to have dinner with a family friend who loves roses so we were off to the flower shop - flowers sure are pretty!

MiamiFlowerShop2.jpg

This nipped at me when I got close:

MiamiFlowerShop1.jpg

Here's what you'll get for $50 in Miami - it was tremendous and very heavy:

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All trips come to a jarring end at a terminal gate. Miami airport was filthy - there was a little mousy:

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A woman screamed and ran away when she saw this little fella.

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As a New Yorker (it's just a mouse, it's not even a rat, lady) and a photographer, I was unfazed and poised to snap photos - mice are very fast and little point and shoot digital cameras can't keep up very well:

MiamiAirportCreature3.jpg

Since we've been back, Jonah and I have been busy eating lots of candy:

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* Miami is special! It doesn't quite feel like you're in America.

** We booked our flight and hotel through travelocity (not so with Tra....velocity!) which had decent package prices.

*** If you're audio sensitive/can be difficult about noise, you should pack a pair of earplugs. The Hotel as all the hotels in the area and architecture in the tropics are constructed with thin walls.



Comments

Your makeup looks pretty. Pastel-y and Shimmer, v. becoming.

Posted by: morgan at July 28, 2006 7:34 PM

Stayed @ the Hotel 4th of July weekend - very nice place, and the pool is amazin' too, if I might say so myself! Didn't like News Cafe - service too slow, food not that great. My hubby and I found a great sandwich place on 14th street with the biggest sandwiches ever! Anyhow, happy to see someone else enjoyed Miami too!

Posted by: Minnie at July 28, 2006 9:00 PM

A very thorough summary - as always. I've loved the Florida clouds in the afternoon... Simply, THE best. The bottom, while clothed tastefully in a non-candy thong, was acceptable; there's a great number of geckos that are jealous of Jonah's post-storm face lick... thingie; wrinkles at 30 (remember, it's ALL maintenance from this point forward); NEVER underestimate the value of floating (EVER); and the candy... unmentionables - don't forget to brush and floss afterwards!

Posted by: |mr|Darcy at July 29, 2006 4:51 AM

I like the one with the girl with the thong. Her butt is just so very very tan that all you see is a neon glowing triangle. lol...

Posted by: Rachel at July 29, 2006 1:01 PM

i totally understand you on the water creature returning to its natural habitat! i am fortunate enough to have been reunited with pool water myself this summer and can't believe how fucking happy i am each and every day :)

looks like you guys had an amazing vacation. rock on.

Posted by: sam at July 31, 2006 12:44 PM
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